Never Grumble the Rumble!

It's Monday, the first after a beautiful Christmas celebration and holiday, and I'm at my office, welcoming some bits of routine.  Getting here wasn't the easiest, however, as Sarah and I stayed one more night in Broken Bow to help cheer her dad on during his birthday dinner.  We woke this morning to see that our 20% chance of snow was 100% falling on the ground.  Nevertheless, we decided to forge ahead and try the roads.

As we carefully made our way over snow-covered roads in the dark, snowy expanse of highway 2, I realized on any other day, the sound of the rumble bar under my tires would be a reason to grumble.  On a dry, well-defined road, rumble bars, now in place on both the sides and the median, present themselves as mere annoyances.  For me the rumble bars usually serve as announcement to my passengers that, yes, once again, Jason has decided to pass a vehicle.  Sleepy eyes open wide and spines straighten as if I had just committed to ramping over the next bridge with our vehicle.  The rumble bars also serve as an announcement to my passengers that, yes, Jason has once again taken his eyes off the road to search for a more engaging station.  The bars mostly seem to serve as the first scolding announcement and a handy prompt for more scolds.

I have often thought to myself, why do we keep doing this to our roads?  Is this really a fix to inebriated driving and snow-covered highways?  I haven't really been a fan of the bars in the past.

But this morning, my allegiances changed.  Without any traffic to help light the road and the addition of a moderate snow cover, at times the road lanes were nearly impossible to distinguish from the shoulders during our drive.  The occasional sound of an under-tire rumble and the constant flare of a road-side marker became welcomed (even desired) signs of guidance, protection, and comfort.  I wouldn't have felt nearly as safe or confident without them.

How many times in life when we're cruising along, wanting to get where we are headed, on our own time, in our own fashion, by whatever means we choose, do we begin to grumble when the "rumble bars" of life hum their announcements and warnings.  We want to tell them to mind their own business and quit pointing out all our choices to others.  We want to fly under the radar, insisting we're doing this just fine.

But just like the state of Nebraska felt it was worth the added expense to lay endless miles of studded tracks down the sides and middles of our roads, God also knows the deeper value of the warnings, revealing truths, and gift of accountability He has put alongside our ways.  When we swear we're doing just fine, God seems unfair and a little too controlling or condemning.  But in all honesty, whether the "weather" is fair or not, God's annoying rumble bars and road markers are often the very things that save our lives and guide our ways to safety and good outcomes.  They are there, in the sun and the snow, to guide and care for us.

And so, even when we do grumble, let's remember to give thanks for the rumble bars of life and the roads.

More to come!

Jason <><

Denying God's Gifts

Who would ever, in their right heart or mind, deny God's gifts or blessings?  It seems when God responds to our needs and petitions, it's often after a long wait and a strenuous haul.  That moment of reception is often a sigh of relief and release of pressure that shows itself as the light of a new dawn in our lives.

So who would deny a gift from God?  Why?

Just yesterday I found myself walking down the very road of wanting to hide what God has been doing in my life.  Since coming to Horizons, our lives have been pretty intense, and 60 to 80 hours weekly is a typical week for me.

Yet, as we approach this Christmas season, a.k.a. the "busy" season, I'm finding a clear path before me minus much of the typical seasonal debris.  It's a tremendous gift from God, a moment of rest, of restoration, of building up for a new season.  Amen!

Holiday lights with my parents!

Yet, as I've considered the extra time I have, decisions have come up about how to spend it the most wisely.  My gut reaction is to fill these open hours with new tasks and future work.  My gut responses when choosing NOT to fill my time with those activities are guilt and fear.  Nevertheless, instead of simply filling my free time with other tasks and greater details in the areas I'm already working, Sarah and I have taken some time to be together.  We took any opportunity last Friday to visit my parents and celebrate my father's birthday.  We are anticipating having the chance to spend a little more time with family over Christmas and New Years.  We're genuinely excited and thankful.

Yet, yesterday at church (12/22), as people asked me how I am and how the season is going so far, my first response was to assure my inquirers I am doing well and, yes, keeping very busy in this season--to the point of being slightly, and typically overwhelmed.

But God's voice came very clearly to me in the midst of my responses:  "Really?  I'm giving you this tremendous gift, the one you've been praying for over a year now, and now that it's hear you're hiding it?"  I quickly had to change my tune and tell the truth:  God has been so good to us so far this Christmas.  I have had some extra time to be with family, to care for my wife, to ponder some deep-heart questions about the future of my ministry.  This is good, and I can't feel guilty about it.

BUT in that moment, I saw how easy it is to hide or deny the gifts God gives us.  We do this for many of the following (inappropriate) reasons:

• We feel guilty or undeserving.  It doesn't feel right to be blessed when others aren't, even though God never promised life would be fair.
• We grow afraid others will be upset we aren't using our extra time on them, and that we are being selfish, even though Jesus reminds us we can't be healthy for others if we aren't healthy for ourselves first.
• We get really used to being the victim of overwhelming situations and over-stuffed schedules, to the point it becomes our identity and our reason for needing others' constant sympathy.  It feels quite discomforting to step away from that role, even though Paul reminds us Jesus set us free for freedom, not so we can just pick up our chains again.  

So today, and for however long this season is, I'm going to share about God's work in my life and live as fully into God's gift as I possibly can.  No guilt, no fear, no need to return to my chains.  Amen!

More to come!

Jason <><

Incompetent and Blessed!

It's a rainy Monday morning just 10 days from Christmas day.  Many people I spoke to yesterday were elated to have the "beautiful" weather.  I honestly think gray and soggy isn't too pretty, even if the temperature registers 50+.  But that's just me.  It might snow this afternoon.

Earlier this year I had the opportunity to spend some time with two successful church leaders in our denomination.  Between several of the conversations and questions my peers and I asked Adam Hamilton and Mike Slaughter regarding some of their keys to success, both responded with similar, deflating, and surprising recommendations:  as a leader of a growing church, the quicker you can admit and publicize your incompetence, the quicker you'll be able to grow.

Serious?  It sounds impossible.  Aren't leaders good at what they do?  Isn't that what sets high-capacity leaders apart?  How then can it be good in any situation to parade about in my inadequacies?
Perhaps it's different in the corporate world, but at church, where Christ is truly the head, this kingdom work isn't about weeding out the greats and putting the most powerful on top.  It's about becoming a stronger, deeper, more diversified community of tightly-knit disciples working together as a mass movement, heading in one direction.

That's when the church truly takes shape as an inextinguishable force for life, light, faith, and good.

I was most recently reminded of this yesterday afternoon as I drove out (behind schedule) to guy's home who is part of a great church family and two HOME groups.  Several men assembled yesterday to help him put up Christmas lights on his house in time for his children, grandchildren, and most importantly, his wife, who has been in the hospital with significant health challenges, arrived at the house.

While I was late to the light-hanging party and was feeling sad I hadn't seen the family since Tuesday, I knew it was going to be okay.  Where my incompetence and inadequacies in my time and availability have cropped up, a sea of loving, competent, church family members and staff have come pouring in.

As I pulled up in front of the house, I saw men everywhere, crawling like ants, working like elves, putting lights up everywhere.  I've seen a ton of these moments lately.  It's beautiful.  It's the church, the body of Christ.  It didn't get to this by my special abilities, but rather my single ability to admit and publicize my shortcomings!

Praise God for being inadequate.  That's when God is the strongest!


More to come!

Jason <><

If a Beard Could Speak

When I first started wearing a beard that looked like a real beard a year ago, several asked me "what does Sarah think about that?"

The truth is, my so-called beard grew out of my pursuit for laziness during our 2013 Thanksgiving break.  It's good for my soul to live drastically distant, when on vacation, from my standard regiment.  Additionally, rather than shaving after Thanksgiving, I simply let the beard grow.  The difference is more than wanting or intending to have a beard, I simply didn't stop it from appearing.

How does Sarah feel about it?

Sarah loves my beard, and certainly more than I do.  I don't mind it, but I think it risks me looking more like a pastor that I may want to at times.  So ultimately, I wear a beard because it's more work not to have it and because my wife loves it.

But what would my beard say if it could speak?  I'm guessing it would say the following:

• Moses had a beard.  If it was good for him, it's good for you.
•  It's too late to go back now.  If you get rid of me, people will squirm in the discomfort of how strange/young/less "manly" you look without me.
• You really should learn to love me, I make you look better, and many men would kill to have me.
• Never mind the sparsely, randomly placed white hairs, it's a work in progress.  

So here's to the beard.  I'm learning to love it, and yes, if I didn't want to keep it, I should have considered shaving it off earlier.  

Plus, it's "Christmasy" and season-appropriate!

More to come!

Jason <><

Even Bo's Coin is Double Sided

My sources tell me it was somewhere in the 2nd part of my message yesterday (11/30) that texts and messages begin pouring onto the phones of those in our 9:30 service.  The buzz was announcing Coach Pelini's termination.  Being fully consumed already by my tryptophan-tied, turkey-tired tongue that was making it difficult to pronounce words correctly, I hardly noticed the interruption.  

But, between services, I was made fully aware of the latest news--the rumors and high-expectations had won.  Nebraska will be seeking a new coach.  My immediate response was disappointment.  Being at the head of an organization that is largely out of my control, but largely under my responsibility, I have a heart for those leading sacrificially, even when the fruit of the labor is hardly visible.  I'm not equaling Pelini to a pastor, but I am certain the pressures and the challenges feel similar.  

Guessing that our second service might feel a little distracted unless I could respond somehow to the news, I shared my disappointment about the fickleness of our society.  It took 700 years for God to fulfill His promise of the Messiah's coming.  The Jewish community (as a whole) did not give up.  On the flip-side, however, it took a coach seven years to build up a good team and coaching program, and we decide it's too long; it's time to go a different route.  I'm concerned we're degrading the meaning and power of hope if we only have the capacity to let it live a short time.  Some things simply take time.  

Yet, the motivation behind today's thoughts is ultimately NOT about whether Coach Pelini should have lost his position or not, but about continually being willing to challenge ourselves by looking at both sides of the situation.  Before we too quickly decide the world is exactly as we see it at first glimpse, I invite us to rain on our own parades and go deeper.  Strong leaders and admirable people of faith alike will take the time and effort to look at the other side of the story, even when it hurts.

The other side of the Pelini coin?  

While many feel the coach's time was cut short and the criticism against him too staunch, leaders who fail to make big moves in order to pursue their visions and directions will ultimately fail to honor their roles as leaders.  The very nature of leadership, whether in the religious or secular field, is to go where people aren't already gathered and bring others along.  Leadership is not simply to go where most people already are and dance in circles.  It's been said that in regard to the competitive nature of university education and the pursuit of excellence, any school wishing to stay on that continuum must be willing and able to make tough calls in order to get to the next level.  In other words, it's difficult to get to the other side of a chasm if we're unwilling to release our stronghold on the side on which we're already standing.  Pelini's departure is UNL's attempt to make a leap forward.

And so, at the end of this, I can't say either way exactly how we should look at the situation or what it truly is a sign of.  But I can say that we should slow down and challenge ourselves to grow in our understanding before we too quickly jump to conclusions and base many of our subsequent choices on those conclusions.  We'll be better leaders and stronger people of faith if we do.

More to come!

Jason <><

Ask Your Wife First!

Being a pastor assures that Sarah and I are always learning about our relationship and about each other.  Not only do we want to set a good, honest example for others, but as I counsel couples preparing for marriage I am continually reminded of what works, what doesn't, and how Sarah and I are called to live into the same things we're teaching.

But sometimes I forget.

This last Sunday (Nov 23rd) I pulled a classic move of talking about Sarah and our practices/challenges in regard to honesty, especially as it applied to physical appearances.  I presented the question, how do we honor honesty while still wanting to help each other feel good about our appearances, even when our outfits just aren't coming together?

There aren't any easy answers to that one.  Honesty sometimes causes hurt.

Open house treats and smiles, even after the message!

As Sarah and I reflected after the service and through out the day, we laughed at how it all came out in the service.  Sarah and I agreed my sharing about our challenges was a great way to open the teaching about how love tells the truth.  But I can still recall the look on her face yesterday as she sat captive in the front row listening to my story unfold.  I realized as I was telling our story, "oh no!  I never told Sarah I was going to share this."

It turned out alright, and contrary to most beliefs, I did not need to sleep either on the couch or in a tent in the backyard.  We actually love having the chance to share about our challenges if they'll help others relate.  In the end, Sarah wasn't upset about my sharing, and we both found some new insight into who we are and how we strive to care for each other,

BUT, we also concluded yesterday rather frankly, I MUST TELL HER FIRST, if I'm going to share.  I usually do, but I forgot this time...  Thank God for grace, trust, and love that doesn't expect perfection from each other.

More to come!


Jason <><

Cutting Corners

I do this thing.  I think most would agree it's completely unnecessary, but I struggle with making any changes.

A perfect example is taking out the trash.  With just two of us in our house, we produce about one 15 gallon bag of trash per week between all of our cans.  Our dumpster we put out on the curb has the capacity to hold about 20 of those 15 gallon bags.  From this, any rational person could conclude it is only necessary to take the smelliest, fullest trash out to the dumpster, and it is only necessary to take the dumpster to the curb when it's nearing capacity.

Yet I struggle to do it.  In my book, when Tuesday comes around for our trash service to come by, every trash can in every room, whether its had any traffic recently or not, must be checked and emptied.  And when the sweep is complete, regardless of the number of bags and the cavernous space remaining in the dumpster, it must go to the curb.  Most readers are probably agreeing, this is simply unnecessary.  But I've often found myself responding, "that's just how I roll..."

Lately, as Christmas and year-end activities and reports begin to accelerate or accumulate, time becomes far more valuable and "of the essence."  My stress increases and the intensity of my workload grows.  This year Sarah, in her gentle wisdom, has been running a quiet campaign to address and release some of the intensity by promoting a corner cutting practice.

Of course, with my spry wit and accompanying angst, I respond to her suggestions of the idea saying "so you mean you want me to cheat God from getting my best."  If I were a little more head-strong, I could pursue this line and win.  But when Sarah speaks like this, a greater wisdom says shut up and listen.  Winning that conversation would most likely lose the war.  Sarah's advise is keen, precise, and insightful.

I may not be very good at following the rules, but when it comes to doing it "right" and to the greatest detail, I rarely if ever cut corners.  Am I cheating God if I start now?  Not necessarily.  We first need to consider how much we are cheating God by refusing to let any detail out of our control and attention.  How many times is our diligence born out of fear, causing us to worry that if we skip any single part or even just one step, the whole effort will undoubtedly fail?  How many times do we pour so much attention into the little things 99% of the rest world won't notice because we've convinced ourselves they are the only things that matter?  How many times have we put God back on the shelf so we have more time and energy to get our projects done?

Too many times, too often.  My focus verse for this latest season has become Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways submit to Him and He will make your paths straight."  I've shared with with many already.  In those simple lines, there is a ton of wisdom telling me to stop manipulating all the details, start submitting all I am working on to our Lord.  Only then will I actually stop cheating God of my best.

In other words, cut some corners.  We'll be blessed to see God taking care of more of the details.


More to come!


Jason <><

Better Get to Playing!

A decorative addition to my office made while I was out one day.

Although it's not necessarily an everyday event at Horizons, I can proudly say a fair amount of "shenanigans" happen in the halls and offices and between staff.  It would be easy to say some of our staff are simply being "childish or obnoxious."  It would be easy to say the jokes, pranks, and laughter are off-task and counterproductive, perhaps even hurtful.  But it'd also be easy to say these things and in the same breath also kill the Spirit of a life-giving, life-sacrificing, out-of-the-box thinking team of life-changers.  No thanks.  We'll stick to playing.

The concept of being playful, even as adults in busy work environments, is not a new concept.  Yet, it has primarily been promoted as a goal for women wanting to "treat, pamper" or provide "extra gentle portions of self-care" to the soul.  To seek or need "play" is often seen as a week or wasteful approach.

But being playful is far more powerful than we make it and should never only be applied to one gender or only to a particular cross-section of our population.  The capacity to cultivate playfulness and engage it is ultimately the freedom we have in Christ to separate ourselves from the pressures, expectations, and doubtful outlooks.

Yet, it's easy to be serious instead.  It's easy to demand excellence and discourage distractions.  It's easy to focus more intently and push for greater concentration on goals and overcoming obstacles.  But the more we do this to an extreme, the less creative, innovative, courageous, and energized we become.  Edwin Friedman, in "Failure of Nerve (Seabury, 2007) suggests that without playfulness, it is difficult to distance ourselves from the things that are not truly us, that we easily become swept away by anxiety, and that we are reduced to operating reactively--like animals.

Paul talked about this quite a bit, encouraging us to no longer by like infants "tossed back and forth by the waves, blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming" (Ephesians 4:14).  We're also reminded not to be of the world and remember who we are and who we are not in 1 John 2:15.

So again today I invite each of us to find opportunities to be playful and cultivate playfulness--at work, in our relationships, families, and with strangers.  It'll do far more than simply make us feel silly.  It will separate us from who and what we are not and give us a chance to re-immerse ourselves in Christ, through whom we came, and through whom we live.

Here's to a good play!

More to come!

Jason <><

Passion More or Less?

One component of a dynamic, magnetic person is his or her passion for life.  In terms of faith, passion for life fully immersed in the grace and life of Jesus.  The energy that comes from a person's passion is enough to change any situation from gray to great.

But how do we recognize passion?  How do we cultivate it in our lives?

Often we end up equating passion with enthusiasm, heightened emotions, and flowery words of confidence, assurance, and commitment.

But Asaph, a lesser known contributor to the Psalms, brings about a different notion of passion as he writes:

"Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.  You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.  Who have I in heaven but you?  And earth has nothing I desire besides you.  My flesh and heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever"
(Psalm 73:23-26).

While we still find words of assurance and commitment within this psalm, we can also see gentle shifts in how this passion is put together differently.

In today's world, if you're looking for someone with passion or hoping to find passion within yourself, look for:

• Commitment:  not just in a person's words, but in the duration of his or her endurance.  Time measures best our steadfast hearts.
• Humility:  not just in how a person puts others before him or herself, but also in how a person rarely makes an effort to be noticed, needs to be consoled, or seeks for reaffirmation regarding his or her choices and direction.   
• Joy:  not just in someone's energy at any moment, but also in his or her gentleness, ability to smile when no one's looking, and willingness to share with others for the simple sake of a blessing. 
• Compassion:  not just compassion that breaks his or her heart, but compassion that is willing to see to the depths of an issue and still know it is God who is being served and who has planted the seed for that particular passion.  

And so, here's to passion.  In some ways the bar is still set rather high, but in other ways, we've been released from superficial notions into the depths of passion that lives a long life.  

More to come!

Jason <><

The Art of Inadequacy

Workaholics, overachievers, and narcissists have a least one commonality between each of them.  Not only do we wish to do and be it all, we sincerely believe we can and are.

I sit in on the Vital Christianity and Covenant classes at Horizons and thoroughly enjoy the conversations, learning, and new relationships that form.  Part of our time together is spent taking a Spiritual Gift inventory.  Although I had already taken it in the Spring VCC, I decided to give it a second try.  It blew my mind and heart.  Last spring I found myself breezing through the questions responding with 4s and 5s (which are high or highest) to most things.  Full of ego and confidence I said to myself of course you're good at most of these things.  You're a pastor, and good pastors are uncharacteristically good at most things...  But it was a little embarrassing later in the class filling in my gifts chart graph and mostly just coloring in a black box.  To a degree, because nothing stood out in contrast to the rest, it still looked like I really didn't have any heightened gifts.

So this time, I chose a new approach.  Honesty.  I forced myself to be realistic and put 1s or 0s by those activities that challenged or didn't fit me.  I was far more conservative with my 4s and 5s as well.  I was terrified as I went through the assessment.  What will people think if they know I'm not really gifted in that?  Shouldn't every pastor have a gift and a heart for that?...  It was also life-giving.  For the first time, I saw the difference between what God had given me in gifts and what God had not.  I caught a glimpse of how God very specifically had certain things in mind for my life--that I wasn't just some willy-nilly random mix of abilities for whatever.  Instead, I was given a unique mix of strengths and weaknesses that shape the entire character of my life and future.  It was a cool moment with God and His Spirit, where I could more clearly see into the depths of what He is doing in my life.

While I was once terrified of being anything less than everything, I'm starting to see the power of inadequacy.  A couple weeks ago I had the chance to be around some pastors leading congregations of 7-12,000 in attendance.  It was astonishing to see each of them pronounce their weaknesses and inadequacies and encourage us not to do it all, but continue to build teams of people who have gifts we don't.  It was brilliant.  God was bringing it all together.





So now, I simply need to live in to my inadequacies and love them.  They'll lead me into a better insight of who God is and give me a chance to see the strengths in others thrive.  Can't wait!


More to come!

Jason <><

Forgetting to Laugh

They say the heart is a muscle that only performs better the more its exercised.  Sarah reminds me often this is the case for nearly every muscle and many of our organs in our bodies.

Maybe it seems like a no-brainer (no pun intended) in the context of this conversation, but in reality, we often fall into a mode of thought that if we overuse something, it may eventually wear out.  While it is true we can overuse our bodies by flooding them with drastic changes in activity or overwhelming them with harmful substances or habits, it still remains true that if we don't use it, we risk loosing it.

I was reminded of this in regard to smiles and the deeper presence of joy this last week.  If we don't find chances to laugh, to smile, to play on a regular basis, we risk atrophy of joy in our lives.  Not seeking and finding joy in our lives has the potential to kill our relationships, our ministries, and our faith in a living, life-giving God,

So just like the heart, we also need to exercise our smiles, our laughter, and our ability to appreciate and enjoy our lives and what we've been given as part of our faith lives and our connection to Jesus and His Spirit in the world.  A friend once told me in an effort to share his best wisdom with me "never take yourself too seriously."  It seems like petty advise, but it has the capacity to hold us accountable in significant ways in regard to laughing for life!


More to come!


Jason <><

Words Living When Embodied

David includes a meditation in one of his psalms asking for all that came from his mouth and heart to be sincere as he says, "Let the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you, Lord, my rock and my redeemer" (Psalm 19:14).

At Horizons we encourage each other to speak plainly, be authentic, and don't try to be someone you're not.  Don't put on a show, and simply do what God is leading you to do--nothing more, nothing less.

But sometimes it's not that easy.  Sometimes we're challenged to let our words, our actions, and our singing voices be more a reflection of the future than of the present.  If we only allowed ourselves to be where we already are, we won't grow.  C.S. Lewis coined this notion in the phrase "fake it 'til you make it" (Mere Christianity), emphasizing the placement of our hearts in the future of our faith and belief we desire until Jesus completes this as reality within us.

Within this then, we see a contradiction of our Christian lives.  How much do we live authentically and how much do we live ideally?  Both have value and merit.

But this weekend as Sarah and I witnessed the joining of Chris and Lenore Berger in marriage on the grassy lawn of Country Bible Church in Bennett, I watched as words and actions, futures and realities all lined up for a moment.  At least for a moment there was holy resolution.

As Chris and Lenore signified their new unity by pouring sands into a single jar, Jamie Brown, friend to the couple and Horizons' lead worship pastor, let out words from Gungor (the band) about how Jesus makes things new, makes beautiful things out of us, out of dust.

In that span of time I saw a man with his own life, his own pain, his own past embodying the words of truth we each desire to be true in our own lives as he breathed out words for us to hear.  Those words became true because his life is true.  And not only that, but he sang those words to a couple who in the midst of their most beautiful moment of being made into something new recognized that they too came from dust and broken things.  They too were living into a truth because they were embodying it.

Ultimately, we're not always in control of when we can embody the truths we seek to live into.  But we can at least be honest about what we hope to see Jesus do in our lives and look for the moments when what He is doing lines up perfectly with what we are hoping.  They are sweet moments!


More to come!

Jason <><

THIS Church Does!

We are currently in our fall campaign for next year's ministries and life-change work.  I'm sure we often sound like broken records as we proclaim how the Horizons ministries are changing lives and making a difference in the world.  Yep... heard it before.

Sure, it's easy to say.

Ultimately, the ministry at Horizons will ALWAYS be about leading the world to Jesus and our crazy cool God.  Our top story will always be about how good God is.

But, in our efforts to do so, God gives us plenty of reasons to know and say He is good with proof and truth.  God is not only good, but God also continually shows us His goodness.

While it's often difficult to put into words and specific instances w
hen God is changing lives at Horizons, this last weekend has shown me just a couple glimpses.  They are worth sharing.

Sarah and I bought a new vehicle over the weekend to replace my former vehicle damaged from a collision with a deer.  The beauty is we bought it with CASH.  We've been saving ardently, and now we own the car.  We have no car payments, no increased burdens, no growing debt.  A year ago, we walked onto a lot and bought Sarah a brand new car for her school commute we'll be paying off for a while yet.  But thanks to the Financial Peace class at Horizons last February, we won't go through the same thing again.  Was our latest purchase new?  Not by any means.  But it's ours and we love it!

This last Sunday (10/05) a young family shared their struggle with a mental illness in their midst.  Mackenzie Agnew shared her pain, her struggles, and the foundations that brought her through her deepest, darkest hours.  Her references to scripture, her mentions of how her family and friends carried her through, and her insistence that God's power and mercy lifting her out of her bleak choices were what I would call "soul-blowing."  God's story and the work He does through Horizons gets very real very quickly when we realize that real lives are at stake.

That's it.  Two stories.  Yet, this is only one weekend, and these are only two among many stories and instances that I don't even know about yet.  

At the end of the day, I am very grateful to know that when I say this church exists to give glory to God and His work in the world that this church DOES see it in our very midst.   

More to come!

Jason ><>

Always Being Remade

A couple events over the past week have reminded me this morning of God's constant working in our lives.

I'm first reminded that God isn't working in me simply to make me a better person.  It's easy to get caught up in that line of thinking, but the truth is, God is working on far bigger goals and against far more destructive evils than He is simply concerned about how good I am.

Put plainly, God is working in all of us, yes, in part because of His infinite love and capacity to care for us individually, but also, and primarily, because the work God does in each of us is done in the effort to build the kingdom, remove hatred, selfishness, and greed, and give birth to love that overcomes all.   In the end, what's done in us is for greater things beyond our own little worlds.

1. The first event that has affected my life this last week, though it may sound silly, has been the repainting of the atrium.  Seeing the energy produced by simply bringing a fresh face to the interiors of our ministry has been powerful.  It reminds me of God's continual blessing of our ministry in the continued desire to use our church in and for the world.  Not only does God provide for us to paint the building, but God also washes our ministry in grace, truth, and life, that we might be energized in the season to come.
   
2. The second event was preaching on fear this weekend as a reflection on Peter and John's work in Acts 3 & 4.  I felt led by the Spirit to teach on fear because of my response to other events in and outside of the church.  I learned a ton about fear as my heart prepared for Sunday.  And now, I'm seeing beyond yesterday's teaching how deeply fear has worked itself into the cracks in my life and heart.  In ways I never anticipated, I'm learning how many of my responses and interactions are based on fear of some sort.  If I am teach others about evoking the Spirit to remove their fear, I too need to ask for the same.  Remake me Lord, and wash me free from fear.  Replace it with your love.  

So here's to constantly being remade, just like being repainted, refreshed, reminded, reprimanded, and recast!  

More to come!

Jason <><

Worried About Being Anxious

Even before I became a fully ordained pastor, the Nebraska United Methodist Church made significant efforts to start us young clergy out on the right foot.  A common saying among those who underwent the family systems and self-awareness trainings came out whispering the same mantra "it's all about the non-anxious presence...".

Keeping a non-anxious presence is a powerful teaching and a powerful practice.  Paul writes in Philippians 4:6-7 on the subject not to be anxious about anything, but instead, to bring all of our worries and requests to God through our prayers and petitions and simply be thankful.  The result of this, Paul says, is that the peace of God that exceeds all understanding will keep our hearts and minds safe, firmly rooted in Jesus.

I chuckle.  Are not worry and anxiety two of our greatest and sometimes sneakiest adversaries?  Worry and anxiety steal us of joy in the moment, they rob us of sleep, they bring disharmony into relationships, and the frequently provoke fruitless reactions.  Additionally, while substance addictions and theft (just to name two) clearly have negative results, worry and anxiety present themselves to be far less harmful.  For example, many of us can confess to muttering the following:  I know it's not good for me to worry, but I just can't help feeling anxious about it.  But rarely do we say to ourselves or others, if you keep worrying like that the police WILL find you and they WILL take you away.  While we know our fretting and getting worked up won't help anything, we seldom have genuine concern for the destructive work our worrying is doing underneath.

So in ministry and in life, I strive to live into the opposite of worry and anxiety and instead live into Paul's words.  The result is often comical though.  Over the weekend Sarah and I learned of some accounting mistakes that threw our counts way off, our pet may have some life-shortening health issues, and several of our family friends have had health emergencies.  To top it off, we've run a little late to some meetings and have felt rushed in general.  What came of our responses was my outward attempt not to feel anxious that left me appearing numb and careless while my insides twisted, and Sarah's outward expressions of all that she was experiencing, giving her a slightly frenzied appearance.

Suffice to say, we both know well that mastery over the practice of giving it to God does not come over night or even over the course of years and trainings.  And while we are taught not to carry all our own burdens, we also must be open enough to life that our hearts still hurt and share concern for those who struggle.

Here's to life and the ongoing lessons for Christian living!


More to come!

Jason <><

Ephesians 3:20, A Relationship!

Now officially in our fall stewardship season, or as I like to call it our "Gearing Up" season, we have begun to embrace Ephesians 3:20 for our focus and our foundation.

It's been exciting to feel as though we as a church community are coming together in this season to rally for next year, to see what we can do together when we unite as brothers and sisters and let God work through us.

It's exciting because the Horizons community feels like its taking more of a shape and that we have a much clearer sense of who we are and what we're called to.  There's excitement in the air, rather than trepidation.

Paul's words in Ephesians 3:20 give glory to God and proclaim that God is able to do far more than we could ask of Him or even imagine, and that God does these things, not before us as we wait and watch, but through us as we work and trust.

The verse is inspiring.  It gives us hope and courage.

But, as I focus on this verse today, I'm also reminded it takes faith.  I need to have faith that this verse isn't just a group of words meant to inspire me, but rather they are words to challenge and affirm me.

It takes faith to believe God will truly do greater things than what we could even ask or imagine in our lives, ministry, families, jobs, and situations.  But it's faith worth finding.  And it's the very first step in seeing God do anything beyond what is well within our control.  We have to be able to believe in it.

In the end, what I see God ultimately doing in this time is building relationships with him.  If you were to let someone pick you up and carry you for a distance, you'd quickly have to grow in your trust of that person not to drop you.  The same is for God.

Let us quickly trust!

More to come!


Jason <><

Not Just Blowing Smoke

Sarah and I are fall people.  (I like to consider myself an all-season kind of guy, but we both like the fall season quite a bit.)

In honor of the changing season and cooler temps, we decided to put a couple pieces of wood on the fireplace and let the season of fires begin!  Having not yet had a chance to have a sweep or inspection, we were a little nervous to get too crazy with the fires.  But, the first fire on the main floor went great.  

Friday night went a little differently.  

We had a movie to finish in the basement where our tv room is, and we lit a fire in there instead.  The lights were off, the movie was great, and the fire was VERY warm.  Perfect!

Yet, as the movie wrapped up, we both wondered if it wasn't a little too warm, and maybe even a little smokey.

We turned the lights on to see a tiny blanket of fog hanging out at the ceiling.  Not good, so we decided to water the fire down and call it good until someone could come over.  As the water drenched the fire, the smoke billowed into the room.  It was at that point Sarah went upstairs to get some fresh air.  

But somehow the smoke had made its way upstairs as well, and our house was filled with a gentle haze.  As we opened windows and turned on fans, we talked about the chance of the fireplace being inoperable.  

But of course, upon closer inspection, it was not the fireplace that turned out to inoperable, but instead the operator being incapable.  In my efforts to OPEN the flue, it turns out I partially CLOSED it.  The smoke simply had nowhere else to go!

Luckily we were only burning fire logs at this point, which burn cleanly.  The smoke has cleared, and we have both learned the proper motion for opening the flue!  Although our second fire ended in smoke, we're still happy to have the fall season upon us.

More to come!

Jason <><

Grace is Getting Bigger

In the busy seasons of life, I often get to Sunday feeling somewhat "unfit" for the day.  Ever felt that way?

Part of it comes from busyness itself and not taking enough time with God.  Part of it comes from being distracted or engulfed by other life activities--from events to vacation to projects at home.  Part of it comes from simply being human and reveling too much in the most recent mistakes and shortfalls.

Don't get me wrong.  I love Sundays, and while I love the opening worship, I am typically so excited to teach and engage God's Word I can hardly stand waiting any longer.  God does brilliant things from the Horizons "pulpit!"  But nevertheless, those feelings of guilt, shame, and inadequacy still flood into the corners and cracks, whether they are valid or not.  Somewhere in the midst of the morning a voice in my heart asks if I really deserve to be representing God.

I know this is spiritual warfare.  This is the message Satan is hoping for us to hold onto in our biggest moments when our potential for the Kingdom is highest.  I also know this is accountability as well.  Arrogance and pride will wreck a servant's heart as quickly as any other drug.

But today what hit me is how God's grace is growing in my life in the midst of these situations.  At times I've struggled with what grace is in its depth.  Grace has been difficult for me to define or pinpoint in my personal walk at many points.

The truth is though, through this struggle, grace in my life is getting bigger and more tangible.  Every Sunday, before each service, I take a moment to fall on my knees behind the stage and say these simply words, "Lord have mercy on me, a sinner.  Let all of what you make out of today be for you, not for me."

And then God does what God intended to do with me, my words, my stories, my insights into His word.  God doesn't worry about how worthy I am.  God simply chooses to use me for His purposes.

As I sit down after delivering a message, I often look at my wife Sarah, give her big eyes about what just happened on the stage, and whisper "God is crazy good!"  After all, God is daily trying to remind us, "...my grace is enough for you because power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Cor 12:9).

Grace.  Simple as that.



More to come!

When You Get a Year Older

Brantley Gilbert at the State Fair

Today I'm a year older than I was yesterday!  I love birthdays!  Do I feel older?  Are there things I regret about being older?  Sort-of, and sure.  I feel like I'm growing up, and I fear not being as in touch with younger crowds as I have been.  Other than that?  Forget it!

So, in honor of my birthday, I've listed some things I've done today and am growing into as I age!

Fishing with my dad

Things I've done in honor of my birthday:

• Gathered around family to celebrate being alive and how much others care for me
• Took some time to reflect on this crazy life so far
• Went fishing with my dad
• Thanked God and smiled at this life He chose for me
• Plucked my ear whiskers
• Scheduled my yearly physical exam

Things I'm growing in:

• My ability to be a steady, gentle, and wise servant and leader for God
• My love and appreciation for spending time with my dad and my fun family
• My eagerness to have children someday



Breakfast with the best!

• My nose, ear, and eyebrow whiskers

Here's to 34 and a great road ahead.  My life has really only begun!

More to come!

Jason <><

Pour Some Sugar...!

COTH (Concert on the Hill) 2014 has made its appearance and like VBS now blesses us with more energy and momentum for a season of "God-serving" to come!  This year's concert was AWESOME!

Although I'd like to say the awesomeness of COTH was such because the COTH band played Def Leopard's "Pour Some Sugar on Me" (as my blog title would suggest, in reference to one of my favorite big-hair-band songs), the day was awesome for far more substantial reasons.

In addition to the great music, games, emcee, food, weather, attendance, and general spirit at the event, one of the best contributors to the awesomeness of the day was the sea of green t-shirts and others who offered their leadership and volunteership for the event.

As we approached the COTH day, many asked if I thought we'd have success this year.  Although the heat, potential rain, difficulties with scheduling and promoting, and a mountain of details all threatened the event, I continually responded out of optimism with the following nugget of truth and hope:

• It's up to God what happens, but I know this for sure.  We have poured a TON of sugar leadership into this year's event.  And where there is leadership, there is likely to be big things happening!

You may be wondering what does leadership have to do with things?  Everything.  Jesus' ministry was backed by leaders called disciples.  The early church was started by leaders called disciples.  The early church grew by recruiting more leaders called ministers.  The Christian movement became a reality because of committed leaders called evangelists, pastors, teachers, etc.  Growth and success in spiritual regards nearly always correlates with growing leadership.

In addition to the church at large, Horizons sees this all the time.  Want to grow VBS?  Sure, invite more kids, but also invite more leaders.  Want to grow a garden for mission purposes at Horizons?  Sure, plant more plants, but also invite more leaders.  The Steering Team has become an astonishing nexus of direction, wisdom, and excellence over the last two years.  Why?  Not only because we've asked the right people, but because we've also invited each member to pour themselves into particular focuses such as stewardship, vision, and leadership.  We've already seen tremendous results, even before proposing specific solutions.  Why?  Because we poured leadership into each of those areas.  

In general, the more leadership God blesses us with at Horizons, the more ownership, passion, energy, prayer, commitment, and support we'll have.  It's a beautiful thing to see, and it's something that clearly leads us closer to becoming devoted followers of Christ!   Thank you leaders!!

More to come!

Jason <><

4 to Life!

Sarah and me taking advantage of a reception photo booth 

This last weekend marked the final wedding of four in a row and several in a summer.  It's been great.  Sarah and I make an event out of each, pray for the couple, join them at their reception for the food and festivities, and do whatever we can to help each couple get on their feet with faith at their sides.  Plus, as I mentioned last week, if the scene is right, we dance!

So what's the best part about being the presiding pastor at a wedding?  There are two huge blessings:

1. I get to be up close and personal with what the Spirit is doing and how grace is working in the couples' lives I've come to love during our time together.  Sure, more often than not, their faces still looked wrinkled and nervous as they listen to the words of the ceremony, but the intensity of being in front of those many people on such a big day gives little indication of the emotions and truths welling up within them.  I get to see underneath into the more realistic emotions of excitement, eagerness, gentleness, and joy.  I get to feel and sense the Spirit wrapping around each couple.  I get to remember all the grace that has already been poured into each couple's lives.  I get to remember how GOOD our God is.
   
2. The second is in the phenomenon of how God chooses to grow us.  Little sense does it make in our world to grow stronger by giving your meals to others.  From a physical perspective, that doesn't really work.  But in a spiritual light, that IS how it works.  When I first meet with a couple, I remind them I've only been married two years and that I know little more about marriage myself than what a fortune cookie might (I enjoy my humor).  While God certainly has given me several gifts for teaching about the art of marriage, the best part is how much Sarah and I learn and are reminded of as I or we pour into these couples.  The more weddings I am part of, the more Sarah and I grow and learn.  If we're telling others to live in certain ways, we also need to pick up these practices.  James reminds us "My brothers and sisters, not many of you should become teachers, because we know that we teacher will be judged more strictly" (James 3:1, CEB).

And so, while Sarah and I may not have the perfect marriage (yet!), we are reminded, on a weekly basis, what we should be striving for, how we should hold ourselves to caring for the other, and just exactly where Jesus is and needs to be in the midst of our relationship.  

For that I'm thankful for each wedding, each opportunity.  And now as I come the the end of a busy wedding season, I say triumphantly, here's to four more added to our life!

More to come!

Jason <><

Dancing Pastor

I imagine someone might have said before that there's a lot to be learned by the way someone dances.  No doubt that's true.  Sarah and I have been to two weddings in consecutive weekends that have revealed as much as could possibly be said about a dancing pastor and his wife.  Just yesterday a local report was shared from an eye witness with the other men in my HOME Group during my absence.  Afterward I heard about it:  "Whoa, Pastor Jason!  I heard you have a couple moves on the dance floor!"  Oh my...

For the record, I like to dance.  I may not know how to dance.  But I dance.  It's the movement and the freedom that prove to be the most rewarding.

Sarah also likes to dance.  She's quite quick to learn a new dance, but I wouldn't say she enjoys the same "freedoms" I experience.

When Sarah and I dance together, it's typically an exchange of "C'mon Sarah, let's move and have a blast!" or "Just be free!" and "Jason, what in the world are you doing??" or "I don't think anyone should see their, or "a", pastor moving like that!"  It's a wild and fun ride, as opposites attract and interact even on the dance floor.

So there we are, out on the dance floor, just as we are in life and in faith, bringing each other into the best parts of our lives.  Sometimes we find ourselves on the other sides of the opposites game, and I'm the one helping draw the line of sensibility.  Regardless, we do the best we can to honor the nudge to be free and also the gentle reminder to be wise from each other.  It's a beautiful thing, and it creates some life-long team practices for us.

But as for the dancing itself:  no it'll never get any better, and yes, to one degree or another, I keep dancing, and signing, and making variably funny comments, and loving life.  Amen!


More to come!


Jason <><

That VBS Chicken!

Every year we debate about the presence of the infamous, villain chicken who threatens to stop VBS.  Valid complaints of the chicken scaring some of the kids and the lingering question of what purpose does the chicken serve continue to surround the existence of the "Evil" Chicken.  

Sarah and I were talking about it the other day while laughing about what the chicken does for the kids.  As soon as a still frame of the chicken would show up on the screens, the kids would boo incessantly.  The night the chicken was posed on the roof looking into the atrium, droves of kids ran to report their spotting and urgency for us to get the chicken.  What we marvel the most about however is the chicken has no real power and has never posed a real threat to the children.  Yet they despise it adamantly.  Have we inappropriately demonized the chicken?


On the other hand, I can see what the chicken represents--and it is far more real.  Each year as VBS comes around, life at Horizons begins to roar.  Energy is high, passion is soaring, hearts are reignited, and Jesus' name is shared.  From a spiritual perspective, Satan deeply opposes this energy and this proclamation of the gospel.  We see much of this opposition, I believe, in the small details that fall apart and threaten to disrupt our efforts--anything from illnesses to minor injuries, schedule conflicts to differences between leaders, to negative energy in general and fatigue.  

In this sense, there is a presence lurking through VBS attempting to bring it to a halt.  I'm thankful for the many, many prayers so many were lifting up during the week that we be protected.  There is no doubt that Horizons' VBS was once again successful beyond what we could anticipate.  This is attributed to the powerful presence of the Holy Spirit surrounding and strengthening our efforts.  It is God's Spirit that leads leaders, that heals differences and bodies, that works all things for good.  

Let us be thankful, and let us continue to pray against the "evil chicken" trying to stop VBS and other Horizons efforts to share Jesus life--life abundant!  


More to come!!

Jason <><

The Heart of VBS (2014) - Final Night

I think many of us can still feel the beats of the opening music, can still hear the shrill of excited screams, and may still be wiping some of the splattered slime from our VBS shirts from a week of awesomeness at Horizons.  This final blog from Troy Knox reminds us of what we did it all for and how it fills our lives!  Enjoy!

"What a weird church

Leading a bunch of antsy elementary students around to learn about God is weird.

Singing is weird.

Dancing is Weird.

I am sure there are several people that think I am weird all of the time but I am particularly weird one week out of the year - VBS week!

When else can I wear neon outfits, face paint, silly wigs and large hats and fit right in? It is so much fun to watch the kids singing and dancing their hearts out and hearing the sincere and innocent answers as they are asked about things like "God sightings".

The emphasis for this years VBS was weird animals and the fact that it is okay to be different or "weird" in your relationship with Christ.  I love the fact that I attend a church that not only allows but encourages me to be weird. I am also particularly proud of the fact that Horizons church itself is "weird". We had over 500 kids at vacation bible school; Bob, Karl, and John got slimed and crew  leaders chugged blended up happy meals all in an effort to make VBS fun, who does that??

Horizons does.

Thank God for all of the wonderfully weird people at Horizons. I am already looking forward to VBS  2015!

Troy Knox"

More to come!

The Heart of VBS (2014) - Night 4

Ever wondered what it's like to be in the VBS band?  Today's blog comes from the Worship Team's bird's-eye-view of what a sea full of God-struck children and adults looks like!  Do you have a VBS perspective or small story?  e-mail derek@horizonschurch.org to share


"It's all about perspective.  The worship team gets a unique perspective during VBS in a blast of 5-10 intense minutes twice a night of pumpin' thumpin' hoppin' get-on-your-feet-clap-your-hands insanity that we call worship music.  Our perspective gives insight into all of the emotions of VBS during the most jam-packed times - opening and closing.  We see everything from the kids who are on their feet screaming at the top of their lungs, to the kids who don't quite know what to think about this "weird" stuff, and even those who shrink away in fear from how much energy is zinging through the air. Then there's the strange old guy who sings 3 octaves lower than the rest of us with his pants backwards.  Maybe that's what those kids were crying about.  We enjoy the chance to get a little crazy :)

The best part for us as adults, though, is that we are reminded to approach God with the same faith and innocence of a child.  We get to break free of our inhibitions (in some of our cases, more than we should), and experience the awesome power of God through the eyes of a child.  Not only is this the best week of the summer for these kids, it is for us too.

Thanks for letting us be part of this crazy experience! - The Worship Team

Lauren Mize
Resource Teacher
Huntington Elementary"


More to come!

The Heart of VBS (2014) - Night 3

Today's thoughts come from a preschooler volunteer Alicia McCune about how VBS transforms adults hearts just as much as the kids'.  Enjoy!

VBS 2014

When I was asked to blog about VBS so far, to be completely honest…I really wasn’t feeling it. Somewhere through the rush of the day, my heart had hardened and felt heavy. It felt like I was going through the motions, struggling to get amped up to lead my “shorter friends”, the preschoolers, in songs.

Taking few seconds in the bathroom, I prayed that my heart would lighten and for God to lead me through the night. I needed His words, not my own.

I headed back into the worship center where the worship team was already bringing the house down, always my favorite part of a VBS night. As I stood in the back and looking around the room full of kids a thought took over my head.  We are planting a seed or maybe nurturing what God has already started. We are laying the foundation of faith. Who knows where a child’s life may take them or where the path may go, but VBS is laying a foundation of faith for them to fall back on when life gets hard.

Leaving the worship center and trucking it back to the room that’s now become a second stage for Dance USA, another thought hit me. When I think of all the volunteers that it takes to run a night of VBS, everybody has their niche.  Everyone has a role that they fill, or a gift that they bring that helps make the night successful. Maybe it will take a few years to figure out where your spot is at VBS, but know there is a spot. Derek and Liz maybe second-guess my role when the Congo line gets crazy but feel this is a good fit.

As the evening came to a close, one last thought came: When it’s all we can do to just show up, it seems that’s all God needs… He takes it from there. With every beat of the songs we sing and get crazy to, he finds us where we are at and through everyone coming together he lifts us up. As the music started last night, the worries and stress of the day faded, it was replaced by love and energy. It’s tangible every night, permeating the week of VBS.  Each night it’s as if we are letting go of ourselves and getting more of our God in. I really dig it J

God bless VBS :-), Alicia

More to come!